Ask M: Dealing with a bully
Dear M,
This girl constantly calls me swear words and taunts me whenever I’m around her. She does whatever she can to make my friends and me feel bad. I never do anything bad to her, and I have no idea why she hates my guts. And I’ve told my parents, but they say, “Don’t let it bother you.” I try to tell them that it’s hard to not let it get to me. Then they say to go tell a teacher, and that never helps. I try to stand up for myself and others, but I don’t know how to at this point. What am I supposed to do when it gets so bad that I don’t want to go to school anymore?
-Bully Victim
Dear Bully Victim,
I think that your parents are right, and this sounds like a cliché), but the more you show the bully that you’re hurting, the more it’s going to make her want to continue. You can feel sad about it, but sometimes “you gotta fake it ‘til you make it.”
There was one case where this young girl was getting bullied, and this is how she handled it: The bully said, “You’re so ugly!” She responded, genuinely, “Oh, you’re not ugly at all!” The kid turned the statement back to the bully with a more positive outcome. I say, “Kill ‘em with kindness,” even when you’re dealing with a bully. I think you should also try to stay away from her when possible, and I think you should still let an adult know what and who you’re dealing with.
Best of luck,
-M
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Brady C • Feb 14, 2018 at 12:30 pm
Well as a 8th grade student I must say that Bullies should be token care of for booth the benefit of the bullied and the Bullies. You could make it buy a bully without doing nothing but we need to remember that you have the right to a safe learning environment. And ignoring a bully hurts both side with the Bully not learning his lesson and doing the same poor thing to some other child and you having to come to school with a bully to deal with rather than important school work. “Holding your anger in is like grasping a hot coal with the intent to throw it at someone else, the only one getting hurt is you”-Buddha. While I think that quote dose not mean taking full out anger on someone, and it dose not literally refer to throwing something at someone what I think that if you feel angry about something you should fix it in a organized way. There is a process mentioned in the student hand book and student rights and responsibility’s given out by the district. School should be a place of safe learning and not ignored harassment. Since everyone goes to school to learn and have a opportunity.
Liban kiyton • Nov 23, 2017 at 10:32 am
Never try to be mean to a bully there trying to make you a bully
AskM • Nov 16, 2017 at 12:22 pm
I understand completely, I think the best option would be to play it out step-by-step, I know it’s difficult and you have to hang in there, but be as kind as possible, it will throw her off and it might influence her to become a better person too. You’ll feel better about the situation if you just take a step back and study the situation and figure out what went wrong. It gets easier.
Sincerely, AskM
Ruby • Nov 9, 2017 at 12:33 pm
That’s good advice, but some people are really emotional and can’t control if they cry or not. What are they supposed to do? Also, what do you do when the bully pops up one day and says we’re friends right to them? Cause I’m guessing that would be really awkward because the person doesnt want to be mean but knows the bully isnt their friend.